


Comfortably Numb

by SimplyG



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Abandonment, Anger, Angst, Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/M, Family Issues, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-30
Updated: 2017-11-30
Packaged: 2019-02-08 22:43:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12874608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SimplyG/pseuds/SimplyG
Summary: Amy comes home to a monosyllabic and depressed Jake and tries to find out what is bothering him.





	Comfortably Numb

**Author's Note:**

> Wow! First time of this platform! I finally decided to ask for an invitation so here I am with my first work on this website and on the fandom. I haven't written anything in YEARS! But I've been obsessed with Brooklyn Nine Nine and I needed some more Jake and Amy fluff!   
> Hope you enjoy it!

"Jake?"

He looked up from the couch where he was sitting. Amy had just entered their shared apartment, she still had her keys in her hands. She was tired, her shift seemed never ending that day. But on top of her tiredness, she had a worried expression on her face.

"Hey Ames..." he said softly, giving her a small smile that didn't reach his eyes.

Her eyes scrutinized Jake. He was in his sweatpants and an old NYPD sweater, but what shocked her most, was his tortured face.

"Hey..." she murmured. She set down her keys and purse and slowly stook a couple of steps in his direction. She had known Jake for a long time, but Amy had never seen him like this. She had seen angry Jake, disappointed Jake and tired Jake. But sad Jake seemed to be the worst. He usually was an happy person, always smiling, always cracking jokes. He didn't show his soft side very often and it was mostly how romantic he was.

Jake didn't look at her, he kept his eyes on the TV, arms crossed and legs up on the coffee table in front of him. He was watching reruns of "Friends", she could hear Jennifer Aniston and David Schwimmer's unmistakable voices. This troubled her even more. When he was in a bad mood, he watched "Die Hard". To be fair, it didn't really matter what mood he was in. As he repeatedly told her: "Die Hard is the best movie ever made in the history of the universe and I WILL NEVER GET TIRED OF IT! IT'S JUST MAGNIFICENT, AMES!" At that point, he was usually making a stupid pose, clutching one of his many many copies of the movie in his hands.

This was bad.

Amy closed her eyes and after giving Jake another look, she went to their bedroom and changed her clothes. The precinct had been incredibly busy that day, she had to almost dive in a dumpster to try to find a knife. Let's just say that the things she found were all slimy, dirty and disgusting.

She knew Jake wouldn't talk to her if she pushed him. She needed to approach him with caution.

* * *

She reentered the room after her shower, hair damp and pyjama on. During that time, Jake hadn't moved. She looked at him a bit closer. He hadn't shaved that morning, hence the stubble on his otherwise smooth face.

For a moment Amy thought he was going to break up with her. She felt her heart beating faster and faster. She tried to think rationally, her mind racing, trying to figure out if there were any signs.

Suddenly, Jake turned his head towards her.

"How did work go? Arrested any perps?"

Amy was surprised. That didn't seem a question someone would ask if they wanted to break up with you.

"Ehm... " she stumbled. "Good. I am exhausted. It was a long day."

He nodded, gave her a smile and turned his head towards the television. Amy walked to him and sat down, her feet under her and her elbow on the arm of the couch.

"How about you? Had a nice day off?" she asked. She was uncomfortable. How could she ask him what was bothering him without making him close up even more?

"Yeah..."

Monosyllabic Jake was something new. Something she had never seen before. They didn't speak for while, both engrossed with their own issues. They didn't realise they gravitated towards each other. Amy's legs had started feeling numb so she turned towards him. Jake's hand came to rest on her thigh and she started playing with the hair at the base of his neck.

Amy wasn't aware of what was going on in the Friend's episode they were watching. She stared at the TV without actually seeing anything.

"Jake?" she whispered. She had to say anything, didn't she? There was something that was troubling him. Deeply.

"Yeah."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Jake looked at her. His eyes filled with sorrow and sadness. Maybe something happened with his family. Despite being a skilled detective, she couldn't figure him out. She was his girlfriend!

He smiled softly at her and moved his hand to squeeze hers. She reciprocated is smile, stroking his cheek with her thumb.

"That's ok, babe. Everything is okay."

* * *

Later that night they were in bed, lights off. They didn't speak much that evening. Although they usually chatted about cases and precinct gossips, their silences were always comfortable.

But Jake couldn't sleep. He was pretty sure Amy was dead to the world. He turned his head towards her, got up on his elbow and leaned on her.

"Jake."

He literally jumped. She was awake, eyes open and an annoyed expression on her face.

"Geeze, Amy! I almost had a heart attack!" he said, falling back on his pillow.

"What were you doing you weirdo!?" she asked sitting up.

"What are YOU doing, scaring me like that. I could have died, Ames. DIED!" he shouted.

They remained silent for a couple of minutes, Jake's heavy breathing was the only sound in the room. She really scared him.

"Sorry babe. Go back to sleep."

Amy ran a hand through his hair and said: "Goodnight."

"Night, babe."

20 minutes later, Jake was still awake. He couldn't get over the phone call he received. He couldn't believe what had happened. On the other hand, he should have guessed it. He should have known things would have turned out this way. He was baffled that he was surprised. The news shocked him to his core. He rolled his eyes and moved towards Amy for the second time that night. He couldn't believe he was so upset about this. He wasn't 7 years old anymore. He was a grown man! He had a great job, an amazing girlfriend he loved more than anything in his life and still, he couldn't shake off the feeling of utter sadness. He had been singing in his head Taylor Swift's "Shake it Off" for the better part of the evening, but even she couldn't help him deal with his emotions.

He wasn't good with emotions but he had to talk to somebody, he needed someone to confide into. And who better than his smart and brave partner?

Amy was curled up on her side, her back to him. He wrapped her in his arms, his chest against her back and arm across her waist.

"Amy..." he whispered in her ear. "Ames... "

"I'm sleeping, Jake." she murmured. She snuggled further into his arms and chest, her eyes still closed.

"No you're not." he stroke her side absently. "Can we talk?"

The tone in his voice was so solemn, it made Amy turn to him. She was laying on her back, Jake's hand near the hem of her pyjama.

"Sure... What's been bothering you today? You seemed weird today."

She ran her hands up and down his arm, a soft smile on her face.

Jake looked at her. He didn't know why he was so afraid of telling her. He wasn't good at talking seriously about this, despite constantly bringing it up as a joke. When he was uncomfortable and in awkward social situations, he made a fool out of himself. He had to confide in Amy, it wasn't like she was going to judge him or regard his emotions as stupid. She was an amazing and considerate person.

With his heart beating fast in his chest, he ran his fingers through her hair, buried his face in her neck and murmured

"My dad died"

He felt Amy stiffen almost immediately.

"What?" a soft whisper broke the silence that had set after his confession.

"My dad died today." he repeated.

He didn't feel anything, just numbness. He hadn't even cried.

"Babe, I'm so sorry." Amy encircled her arms about him, one hand between his shoulder blades and the other on the back of his neck. She nudged his body and he moved a little, their legs intertwining so he was almost on top of her. All he felt was her: her perfume, her chest rising against his, her sweet words of comfort…

"Jake… What happened?" She had tears in her eyes and she had to breathe deeply to find the strength to articulate the words. Jake's face was buried in her neck, he had to lift his head to talk.

"He had a heart attack. My mom called me around noon. She was still his emergency contact after all this years."

His arms tighten around her, he needed her close, he needed to touch her and remind himself she was real and there with him.

"Had that ever happened before?" she asked.

"How would I know? It's not like we were close. I barely saw him even after he got back together with my mom." his tune was an angry one and Amy flinched a little. He noticed it and felt like shit. "Sorry. I didn't mean it."

"It's okay, babe." She ran her hand up and down his back, holding him even closer. She felt him crying on her shoulder, tears falling on her collarbone.

She rocked him for a while, comforting his as best as she could. She didn't know how much time had gone by, but after a while, she felt him relax into her. Maybe he was asleep. Amy couldn't believe Roger Peralta died. But most of all, she was shocked by Jake's weird reaction. He didn't say anything, he almost didn't even react. He kept this secret for the entire day, he didn't even go visit him mom… He often joked about his abandonment issues and his problems with his dad, but they never talked about it in a serious way. He simply refused or he left the room after telling a stupid joke. But Amy knew how much that affected him, how much being constantly disappointed by his dad broke him inside.

"Ames…"

She was startled for a moment but then resumed stroking his back.

"Jakey…"

"He died, Amy. Just like that. It's not like he was present for most of my life. I hadn't seen him in three years. Not even a call, babe."

Amy's heart broke.

"And it wasn't just his fault. I didn't call him either. I didn't feel the need to. I have you, my mom and the squad. Why would I need a man I barely knew and that has never cared about me or my mom?"

"Jake…"

" I'm sorry, the man is dead and I just feel angry! Now he had permanently left. He's never coming back."

Amy slightly moved under him, freed her arms and put her hands on the sides of his face.

"I know that despite everything, you loved him. He was a crappy father to you but it's okay to be angry at him. All you are feeling now, it's okay."

Jake looked into her eyes and for the first time that day, he felt warm and content. She was his home, his rock. She was the only person he wanted to be with, the only one he wanted to talk to.

"I love you."

Amy smiled and kiss him. "I love you too. Why didn't you tell me sooner? You've had this burden on you the whole day!"

He settled back into the crook of her neck and hugged her close.

"I couldn't find the words and I just… I don't like to talk about serious stuff."

"I know you don't. Are you okay, babe?"

Jake lifted himself from the bed and flushed his body against hers, his arms on either side of his face. He smiled lovingly.

"I am. I totally am."

He brushed his fingers on her side, tickling her. She let out a giggle and tried to catch his hands to stop him.

"Jake, get your hands off of me!" she cried.

"Get your hands off of me" title of your sex tape". Amy smiled and laughed wholeheartedly. He was joking, so he was on the right track of feeling like himself again.

They settled back in their embrace and after a while they both fell asleep.

* * *

The next morning, Jake almost felt like himself again. They both took the day off and went to visit his mom and made arrangement for Captain Peralta's funeral. Jake was sure he wouldn't have been able to handle all of those emotions without Amy. She was next to him the entire day, somehow always touching him: a hand on his back or simply a shoulder for him to rely on. That night when they were in bed, he looked over her, her arm around his middle, a content smile on her face and he knew he was going to spend the rest of his life with her.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!   
> Let me know your thoughts, I would love to chat about the show!


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